Lesson 20 - Glory of the Aposticha, Sunday After the Nativity

basil

Παλαιό Μέλος
#2
Nice work, Sam!

I noticed that you used a 0001001 formula for "commemorated by priests." This is slightly problematic for me because the second syllable of "commemorated" (which receives the primary accent) is assigned a 0, while the fourth syllable (which receives the secondary accent) is assigned a 1. So ideally, I would prefer to use a 0101001 formula for this phrase.

I also noticed that you have divided the last sentence between "And boasting, we say: Our Father" and "which art in the Heavens." In this case "Our Father" is not grammatically related to "And boasting, we say," yet they are grouped together. Also, "Our Father" and "which art in the Heavens" are grammatically related, but they are not grouped together. I believe that a better choice would be to divide the sentence as follows: "And boasting, we say: / Our Father, which art in the Heavens." And in general, phrases should be broken after periods, semicolons, and colons whenever possible.

Your solution for "Heavens" isn't such a bad idea, but I am uncomfortable with the transition to the diatonic scale on the "ni" immediately following it. I don't recall ever hearing a transition like that before, and I'm not sure that it's traditional. I think it is an "unwritten rule" that melodies only move from high "pa" to either "dhi" or "ke" in Plagal Second Mode. Perhaps Papa Ephraim can either confirm or refute this intuition of mine. I think that a more traditional choice in this case would be a cadence on "ke" for "which art in the Heavens." We have enough choices in the formula book that we can still hit high "pa" for "Heaven" and end on "ke." From "ke," we can safely transition to the diatonic scale for the next phrase on "dhi" ("hallowed be Thy Name").

We could implement these two suggestions as follows: Use an heirmologic bridge of "pa dhi ga dhi" for "And boasting there-" followed by the fourth 100 formula on page 557 for "-in we say." Then use the end of the 0010 formula on page 576 for "Our Father," a "ke" for "which," and then the last 10010 on page 577 for "art in the Heavens." Then I would put a petaste with a klasma and a fthora for "Hal-" and use the end of the 10X0100 formula on page 560 for "-lowed be Thy Name."
 

frephraim

Παλαιό Μέλος
#3
I agree with all of Basil's comments and suggestions. I am also unaware of any melodies that switch from a hard chromatic high Pa to a diatonic high Nee.
 

frephraim

Παλαιό Μέλος
#5
It looks much better now. I still noticed a few minor issues:
1. Although it isn't wrong to use an oligon for an accented syllable followed by a single descending note, it is much more common to use a petaste. So the jump of 3 in line 5 would be better as a petaste.
2. I don't think the comma after the word "Father" merits holding its final syllable for two beats (and thus ruining the smooth rhythm) for this melody. I would remove the klasma for the syllable "-ther".
3. In the second-to-last line, there is something that looks sort of like a vareia before the word "Friend". It should be deleted.
 
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